Feeling Better

My left calf muscle is starting to feel better.  I ran 5.5 miles to work today, and another 5.5 miles back home.

I wish I was able to get some longer training runs in over the last few weeks, but I'm feeling o.k. about the Dirty Dozen race this coming weekend.  I'm not sure if I'll hit my goal of running over 62 miles, but I should be able to run over 50 miles... and I guess I'll just have to be happy with that.

I feel like I need to go out there this weekend and run as far as I can... but I also need to remember that I'm doing this event because it's fun and I'll get to see a few friends that I only see when I run these events.

I plan on getting a short cadence workout on my bike tomorrow, a short run on Thursday, and then just relaxing on Friday.

Hopefully everything will come together on Saturday. 

until next time

KEEP RUNNING!!!!

So Far So Good... Enough

I went for a run today and my calf didn't blow up.  I took the first mile pretty easy.  I started off with more of a shuffle than a run for the first 400 meters, and then I gradually built my pace up.  By 1.5 miles into my run I felt like everything was getting warmed up, and my original goal was to just average a 10 min mile pace over about 5-6 miles.

At mile 2 I was starting to feel a little better and I could tell that my pace was slightly picking up.  I decided to run out for 3 miles at this point since things were starting to feel pretty good, and way better that yesterday.  When I hit mile 3 my calf muscle still felt tight, it didn't feel too bad.

I decided to pick up the pace a little and see how everything would hold up.  Everything was feeling sustainable, so I decided to run a little based off my heart rate and not look at my pace at all.  I've been doing a few runs like this lately, so I already had my watch set to show just distance and heart rate on one page on the display.

Around mile 3.5 I decided to get my heart rate up to 150 bpm and to just hold it there.  I like focusing on heart rate from time to time so I can give my workouts some variety.  I was feeling pretty good holding 150 bpm and decided to move move it up to 165 bpm for the last mile.  I started to increase my effort, and it felt like it was taking a lot of work to reach 165+ bpm.  It took me .35 miles of pushing (from mile 5 to mile 5.35) to get my heart rate up to 165.  Once I got there I was able to hold it here for the rest of my run.

When I got done with my run I felt pretty good.  My calf was a little sore, but it felt ok.

I uploaded my training run onto Garmin Connect to see the stats of my run. I was very happy with my mile times, especially when I saw that I had ran negative splits too.

Mile 1 - 9:39
Mile 2 - 9:04
Mile 3 - 8:53
Mile 4 - 7:53
Mile 5 - 7:32
Mile 6 - 7:01

I think I will run decently at the Dirty Dozen race this weekend.  I just have to be smart about my recovery this week.  I will do two 4.5 mile runs tomorrow (running to work and back home) and maybe a 2 mile shake out run on Thursday.

Other than that, the rest of the week I will focus on resting, recovering, and meditating.  A rested body and clear mind will benefit me very much this weekend.

Hopefully my calf will feel fine by Saturday morning, and everything will go according to plan.


until next time...

KEEP RUNNING!!!!

It's Been Awhile

It's been awhile since I've written anything on here.  I've been meaning to, but I've just fallen off for whatever reason.  I ran American River Run back in April and paced my friend Audrey at the Miwok 100k... so I have plenty to write about, I've just been a little distracted and busy I guess.  I also have video that I need to edit from both of those events.

I figured that I should jump on here tonight and write something, especially since I've had a couple people come into where I work, Fleet Feet Sports in Fresno, and ask me why I haven't updated my blog in a few months.

So, here I am... writing again.

This coming Saturday I am running the Dirty Dozen 12 hour race at Point Pinole Regional Park.  My training has not been what I would like it to be, but some training is better than no training.  In the last couple weeks my left calf muscle has been bugging me a little bit.  I was planning on going on an easy run today after work, but for some reason by the end of m shift my calf was really bothering me.  I decided to see how things would go anyway.

I walked over to Woodward Park after my shift at Fleet Feet was over.  I walked over to the hill that I planned on doing some repeats on, and my calf was feeling really tight.  I sat on a bench at the bottom of the hill and tried to massage the muscle out a little, but that didn't do me any good.  I ran about 5 feet and had to stop.  The pain in my leg was too much to handle and there was no way I would be able to safely run on it.  I sat back down for a few mins, and then decided to walk back to my car.

So, now I'm sitting here on the couch, wondering what will come of my upcoming race.  Will my leg feel better tomorrow so that I can run the 7 miles I planned on... or will it hurt?

I was actually planning on using this upcoming 12 hour run as a last minute fundraiser for the Free Tibet Campaign.  I wanted to see if I could get some friends to make a donating based on how many miles I am able to run, but now I'm not sure if I'll even be able to run.

I hope that maybe some time on my Trigger Point foam roller between today and Saturday morning will help my leg feel better, and I'm trying to stay optimistic about it.  I tend to have a high pain tolerance, so when something actually stops me from training I take it pretty seriously.

Hopefully tomorrow morning everything will feel fine if I get some good rest and foam rolling in tonight.

With a little bit of luck I'll be on here tomorrow posting about how my Monday morning run went amazing and how good my leg feels.  I guess we will just have to see what tomorrow has waiting for me.


until next time...


KEEP RUNNING!!!!

Barn Burner 24 Hour 03-25-2017

Last weekend I set out to run my first really long run of 2017.  I ran The Barn Burner in Sanger California.  This was a race that had a 6, 12, and 24 hour option and was a 1 mile loop.  My goal was to run 105 miles.

The race started off fine.  I hit mile 25 right on time at 5 hours.  My next goal was to hit mile 50 somewhere around 10 to 11 hours.  I guess my lack of overall training had caught up to me.  I had a lot of stuff going on over the last couple months, jiu jitsu and work mainly, so my focus on running took a bit of a back seat.

I wasn't feeling very good about the race the week before the event.  I knew that I was under-trained, and if I was really going to break 100 miles in 24 hours it wasn't going to be easy.

Samantha ran with for a little bit after I hit the 6 hour mark, and my friend Megan ran from about mile 40 to 50 with me.

Around mile 35 I was already dropping my pace.  I was getting a little slower each loop that I ran.  It took me 12 hours to hit mile 48.  I was way behind schedule.  At this point I had to decide on what I wanted to do.  I didn't feel like I could honestly push for the next 12 hours to make my 100 mile goal, so I decided to just back off and plan a new goal.  I talked to Samantha and Megan about what I was thinking.  Since I have a 50 mile race the weekend after this event, I really didn't want to kill myself so I can make my goal today and then possibly not be able to run very well the next weekend.

I decided to run until I hit mile 50.  Once I did that I took a rest for about 90 mins.  I took a short nap and Samantha gave me an awesome leg message.

Once my rest was over I ran 12 miles.  This put me at 62 miles (100k) and then I took a 3 hour rest and slept in a chair for a little bit.

After I woke up from my second nap, I told myself that I would try to finish at least 75 miles at the event.  Samantha ran the last few miles with me, and my friend Sunny ran with us for my last mile.

At the end of the 24 hour period I had ran 75 miles.  I was pretty upset with myself.  I've ran 100 miles in under 24 hour enough times to know what I need to do to train to pull that off.  I was really disappointed with myself (and still am) with how I handled this race.  I know I needed to work harder than I did, and when things got hard... I simply didn't push hard enough.

This coming weekend I'm running the American River 50 miler (AR50) for my 8th year in a row.  I'm not going for a crazy fast time.  I'm actually really excited because I'm planning on running it the entire time with my friends Sheri and Dave.  Sheri and I met running AR50 a few years ago.  We figured out that we were both from Fresno and we also ran the lasts 20ish miles together.  We decided to keep in-touch, and have been friends and training partners ever since that race.


Things didn't go the way I planned at Barn Burner.  I know what I need to do to train and improve for my next big race (Dirty Dozen 12 hour this July) and right now I feel motivated to do it.

This coming weekend I'm going to have fun running 50 miles with a couple friends.  After that I"m going to relax for a week... and then it's back to business.  I can't wait to get faster and stronger again.


until next time...

KEEP RUNNING!!!!

Break Time Is Over

I haven't ran much since Thanksgiving, and I wasn't really running much before that as well.  Last night I decided to get back into swing with my old night time workout.  So last night I did a bunch of pushups and single leg squats.

My real motivated for getting back into this routine hit me last week.  Last Thursday I decided to go for a run on a trail that is about 30 mins from my house.  I haven't ran any trails in a long time, and it was showing during this training run.

I was running on the San Joaquin River Trail and I was not having the level of fun that I usually do.  The entire run I felt like I was getting my ass kicked.  I wasn't running the hills like I use to, and I was feeling really tired.  I wanted to get in 12 to 14 miles, but cut it short at 8ish miles. My garmin malfunctioned 5 miles into my run, but I'm pretty sure my route was just over 8 miles.

It sucks when you go out for a mentally relaxing run, but you end up just getting your butt kicked and wishing it was over.

So... now I'm back to doing the things that allowed me to comfortability push up the hills and run hard without feeling like I'm about to die. 

I hated how I felt during my run last week, and hopefully I can hit the trail again soon and not feel like shit.  I know it won't take much time to get back what I've lost.  It's not like I'm completely out of shape.  I just need to start doing the workouts that work for me.  It's time for a lot of pushups, single leg squats, jumping rope, and H.I.I.T. workouts.

The good thing about logging your workouts is that you can go back and look at what seemed to actually work and what didn't work. 

It's like KRS-ONE said... "If you don't repeat the actions of your own success, you can't be successful. You gotta know your own formula, your own ingredients, what made you, YOU."

Until next time...

KEEP RUNNING!!!

Ups and Downs

Somewhere between happy,
and total fucking wreck,
Feet sometimes on solid ground,
sometimes at the edge...
-rise against (survive)

Over the last few years I've had my share of depression... at times really bad depression.  It's something that I've learned to deal with.  I honestly can't think of a time in my life where I haven't had to deal with some type of overwhelming depression.  I've spent most of my life bouncing from feeling happy to severely sad a lot... and most of the time having no real idea what brings on the feeling of sadness.

There are times where I feel on top of the world, and times where I feel like everything is falling apart and landing on me.  I've been really stressed out with trying to find a steady full time job over the last 2 years now.  Constantly coming up short, and trying to be positive about it... trying to not let my kids see the look of constant disappointment on my face.  It's hard to go to job interview after job interview and keep coming up short.  It's a kick in the ass when you apply for a job, get an interview, get turned down, and then a week later get an email from that company stating that they are hiring for the exact position that you applied for because you signed up on their website to get an email whenever there is a job opening posted. You start to feel like, "I guess they would rather be short handed instead of hiring me... FUCK, I must really suck."

Sometimes it gets hard to put on a smile and act chipper around my kids, but that's part of being a parent.  I constantly feel like I've let them down.  I've had to rely on a lot of help from my parents over the last 2 years.  I'm almost 40 years old and can't seem to pull my shit together.  I randomly have thoughts of, "Things are going to work out... things are going to turn around..." and then I seem to still be in the same place weeks later.  It gets hard to be positive, but you have to find a way to.  When the low points come you have to remind yourself that it's just a phase and won't last forever.  Life is all about perception...


I walk on wounds
that seldom prove to slow me down
I laugh this constant pain away
so you can't tell

But there it lies under the smiles
it drains me mile after mile
But seldom proves to slow me down
here I go... here I go..
-rise against (hairline fracture)

Yesterday I was feeling really down.  I headed over to Jiu Jitsu class, sat in the parking lot for 10 mins, then drove home.  It sucks when you're feeling so low that you don't even want to do the things you typically enjoy doing.

When I got home my friend Bernard sent me a text asking if we could practice Wednesday afternoon.  I told him that I had just went to class and didn't even make it in the door, and that I was feeling "a little off" and didn't feel like doing jiu jitsu very much.  Bernard and I talked about what was going on with me, and he strongly suggested that we get together and get in a good jiu jitsu training session.

I met up with Bernard in the afternoon.  The gym we train at isn't open until the evening, so it was just the 2 of us getting together to train.  Bernard and I started getting ready to train and right before we hit the mat, our friend Steve walk into the gym (Steve owns the gym we train at and is the black belt we train under... and is also a very good long time friend).  Steve come into the gym and tells us, "I just happened to be driving by and saw your cars parked in front... let's get rollin'!"

Steve, Bernard and I go way back... way back.  They have always been there for me, on and off the mat.  After 30 mins of getting my ass kick by these guys we started going over technique, strategy, and some drills.  The more we practiced the better I started to feel.

Steve and Bernard have always been able to see through my bullshit.  If they ask me how I'm feeling, and I say "I'm doing fine," they know if I'm giving them bullshit.  It's good to have friends that keep you in check, and these guys have always done that.


This grip will loosen
but it never breaks
-rise against (injection)

If there is one thing I have learned from running and jiu jitsu, it is to never give up... no matter how difficult something seems to feel.  A bad situation can be turned around in just an instance.  I've ran 100 mile races where I've felt like crap one second, and then felt amazing the next.  I've had my ass kicked during jiu jitsu matches, and found ways to win with 15 seconds left on the clock.  When you're down it can be hard to get back up.  Sometimes you have to lay down for a little bit and feel sorry for yourself... and that's ok, as long as you remember not to stay down for too long and that you need to get back up.

I'm lucky to have the people I do in my life.  My parents will always have my back, my kids will always motivate me to do better, my sister Christine is always checking up on me and giving me her love and support, and Bernard & Steve will never let me give up.

Then there's Samantha... I can't say enough about her.  She's become my best friend, the person I can confide in, and someone who will listen without judgement.  She came into my life very randomly, when I least expected it.  I'm thankful for everyday that I have her in my life.



until next time...

KEEP RUNNING!!!!

Joshua Tree 100 Miler 10-08-2016

I was looking for a new 100 mile race to run in 2016.  I came across the Joshua Tree 100 miler one day, and decided that I would put it on my list for 2016.  It was just 4 weeks after the Headlands 100 miler, and I felt like that was enough time between races to recover and still run a decent race.

My parents and I headed over to the race on Friday morning so that we could camp out at the Start/Finish area that night.  We got to Joshua Tree around 5:00pm and set up our camp site.  My parents set up their 2 person tent, and I decided I wanted to sleep outside under the start and see the beauty desert sky.

The race started early Saturday morning at 6:00am, and consisted of running 5 miles out to an aid station, and then running 5 miles back to the start/finish area.  We had to do this 10 times to cover 100 miles.  The first 5 miles were at a slight rolling decline, and of course that means that the 5 miles back were at a slight rolling incline back to the start/finish area.  The weather was going to be hot, the trail was 100% exposed, and I wanted to be smart and not burn myself out at the beginning of the race. The weather was about 90-100 degrees during the hotter parts of the day depending on what part of the course you were on.  I was being smart and not running too fast because I figured that I would run harder in the evening once the weather cooled off.

Around mile 60 the sun was down, and I was taking a fast dinner break.  My parents had a hamburger and Dr Pepper waiting for me at the start/finish area... and it was delicious!!  It was nice taking a break from eating gels, and I prefer to eat food during races.

I kept expecting the weather to cool off in the evening, but it didn't.  I'm not sure what the exact temperature was in the evening, but it was warm.  I ran the entire race in my Fleet Feet Racing singlet and I never got cold during the evening portion of the race.

There were parts of the course where the footing was like running on the beach.  Even with wearing debris gaiters I still had to stop every 10 miles to get the dirt out of my shoes.  This was driving me crazy because I hate stopping during races to take off my shoes.

During much of the race I was questioning why I was even out there.  I was starting to feel like maybe I wasn't recovered enough from the Headlands 100 race that I had ran 4 week prior to this race.  My legs were feeling a little heavy, and I had a few battles going through my head.

Even with all the 100 mile races that I have completed, I still have moments of self-doubt at events.  This race wasn't as bad as some others that I've done, but I did have some pretty dark moments that I had to battle back from.  I always walk away from a 100 mile race learning a little bit about myself.  There were many times during this race where I questioned why I even do these events, if I really wanted to be out there running, and if these were even fun anymore.  I have enough experience doing these events that I know these moments will pass, because they always do.  I know that if I keep pushing through the self-doubt and the voices inside my head that say I should pack it up and quit, I can push through and finish.

When all was said and done, I was able to finish the race just under 24 hours.  My finishing time was 23 hours and 40 mins.  This finishing time was good enough to put me in 2nd place overall when I crossed the finish line.  I really wanted to finish a little faster, but in the end I was honestly just happy to finish in under 24 hours.  While a faster finishing time was what I really wanted, a sub 24 hour finish was the main goal, and I was able to walk away with a silver sub 24 hour buckle.

I love running 100 mile races... for some reason.  I appreciate the hard work that goes into finishing this distance.  You can't "fake" a 100 mile race.  There's so much that goes into it... mentally and physically.  I won't have a chance to run another 100 mile race until March of next year (2017) when I run the Barn Burner 24 hour race that is held just outside of my hometown of Fresno.  I plan on trying to break my 100 mile pr of 20 hours and 45 mins at this 24 hour event, and then just running more and more until I it the 24 hour mark.

My next event will be the 2 Cities Marathon in Fresno.  I'm pacing the 4 hour group, like I do every year, and Samantha will be running as well.  This will be her very first marathon and I'm super excited to see how she does.



Until next time...

KEEP RUNNING!!!!